Living with Invisible Grief
You have lived with a secret that shattered everything—your trust, your reality, your sense of safety. The betrayal you carry runs profoundly deep, far beyond what words can fully capture. Often, you may feel fractured and tangled in a complex web of memories, fears, and grief that resist neat explanation or resolution. This trauma is not just emotional pain; it is a form of complex PTSD—a layered trauma rewriting the story of your life.
You might question your sanity or long for a way to simply move forward, all while grieving not only what was lost but the life and future you believed in—a future rewritten without your consent. Isolation deepens as those around you struggle to understand your altered reality. This invisible grief compounds the pain seeded by deception and betrayal.
You might question your sanity or long for a way to simply move forward, all while grieving not only what was lost but the life and future you believed in—a future rewritten without your consent. Isolation deepens as those around you struggle to understand your altered reality. This invisible grief compounds the pain seeded by deception and betrayal.
Healing the Triadic Core: Body, Gender and Sexuality
At the heart of this injury is your triadic core—where body, sexuality, and gender identity converge. The trauma inflicted by deceptive sexual abuse and integrity violations attacks this delicate core, altering not just your physical and sexual connection but also deeply wounding your sense of self.
You may feel disconnected from your body, as if watching life from the outside, engulfed by shame, confusion, and fear that cloud your sexual identity and gender experience. This wound transcends ordinary relationship pain, striking the foundation of identity, worth, and belonging.
Healing is neither quick nor linear. It begins with establishing safety and rebuilding connection to yourself. Using specialized somatic and trauma-informed approaches, healing nurtures reconnection—where your body learns to trust again, your sexuality finds its voice, and your spirit feels seen, whole, and valued.
You may feel disconnected from your body, as if watching life from the outside, engulfed by shame, confusion, and fear that cloud your sexual identity and gender experience. This wound transcends ordinary relationship pain, striking the foundation of identity, worth, and belonging.
Healing is neither quick nor linear. It begins with establishing safety and rebuilding connection to yourself. Using specialized somatic and trauma-informed approaches, healing nurtures reconnection—where your body learns to trust again, your sexuality finds its voice, and your spirit feels seen, whole, and valued.
The Triadic Core Defined
The triadic core includes sexuality and sexual self, gender and gender esteem, and biology and physical body—overlapping and central to your identity and self-nourishment. Wounds here run deep, often lifelong, and are sensitive to shame and stigma that may be weaponized by social forces.Deceptive Sexuality Trauma (DST) uniquely traumatizes this core, shattering foundational identity layers and disrupting attachment, causing complex psychological impact and shaping your experience in profound ways.
Complex PTSD: The Invisible Weight
Your experience often surpasses typical PTSD. Ongoing betrayal triggers complex PTSD, marked by emotional dysregulation, hypervigilance, dissociation, and fractured trust. Your nervous system stays locked in survival mode—both numb and hyper-alert—making daily life tenuous. This is not weakness but your body’s effort to shield you from unbearable pain.
Grief That No One Sees
Your grief is multilayered:
Mourning the loss of your old life
the illusions of safety, honesty, and love you once believed in.
Grieving lost potential futures
the life and family you once imagined but now seem impossible.
Feeling the loss of community
friends and family who may drift away, unable to understand your changed reality.
Mourning the loss of identity
the person you thought you were, fractured beneath the weight of betrayal.
This ambiguous, layered grief can feel relentless and incomprehensible, resisting closure because the betrayal remains ongoing or obscured. It deserves compassion, recognition, and sacred space for healing.
Mourning the loss of your old life
the illusions of safety, honesty, and love you once believed in.
Grieving lost potential futures
the life and family you once imagined but now seem impossible.
Feeling the loss of community
friends and family who may drift away, unable to understand your changed reality.
Mourning the loss of identity
the person you thought you were, fractured beneath the weight of betrayal.
This ambiguous, layered grief can feel relentless and incomprehensible, resisting closure because the betrayal remains ongoing or obscured. It deserves compassion, recognition, and sacred space for healing.
Immediate Crisis Support and Early Recovery
In the darkest, most overwhelming moments, you receive grounding, somatic regulation, safety planning, and radical validation of your lived experience. Together, we work to reestablish connection to your sense of reality and reduce distress.
As healing progresses, work focuses on trauma integration, rebuilding trust—in yourself and others—repairing relationships if possible, and creating empowering new narratives that illuminate your path forward.
As healing progresses, work focuses on trauma integration, rebuilding trust—in yourself and others—repairing relationships if possible, and creating empowering new narratives that illuminate your path forward.
Why reach out to me?
Drawing on deep clinical expertise, specialized training in the DSTT model, and an integrative somatic approach, I offer care that goes beyond traditional betrayal trauma approaches by:
· Holding radical validation for your experience without blame or pathologizing you.
· Integrating somatic healing to address trauma embodied beyond the mind.
· Honoring your full intersectional identity—cultural, spiritual, faith-based, LGBTQ+, and more.
· Supporting you whether you’re preparing to leave, healing post-separation, or rebuilding within the relationship.
· Providing guidance for safety, boundary-setting, and navigating complex emotional terrain.
· Recognizing and treating treatment-induced trauma often overlooked elsewhere.
· Holding radical validation for your experience without blame or pathologizing you.
· Integrating somatic healing to address trauma embodied beyond the mind.
· Honoring your full intersectional identity—cultural, spiritual, faith-based, LGBTQ+, and more.
· Supporting you whether you’re preparing to leave, healing post-separation, or rebuilding within the relationship.
· Providing guidance for safety, boundary-setting, and navigating complex emotional terrain.
· Recognizing and treating treatment-induced trauma often overlooked elsewhere.
I walk fiercely with you, helping rewire survival patterns, restore self-trust, and rebuild authentic connection. Your unique story, voice, and power shape your healing journey here.
Why reach out to me? Why reach out to me?
Traning & Experience
Healing is not about returning to what was—it’s about creating something entirely new. Together, we navigate the complex terrain from the chaos of betrayal trauma toward clarity, resilience, and growth.
You will learn to trust your intuition again, confidently identify red and green flags, reclaim your body and identity, and build meaningful relationships based on respect and authenticity.
You will learn to trust your intuition again, confidently identify red and green flags, reclaim your body and identity, and build meaningful relationships based on respect and authenticity.
Moving From Surviving to Living Fully
Long-Term Healing and Thriving:
When you’re ready, I am here to help you take the next step. Reach out confidentially and begin reclaiming your life, your voice, and your power in a space designed for your healing journey.
You don’t have to walk this path alone anymore. This is where hope begins and healing continues.
You don’t have to walk this path alone anymore. This is where hope begins and healing continues.
